I've blogged about this topic before, but it hit me again this week to wonder how much more stressed women are in childrearing since the advent of the nuclear family and women being isolated at home all day with young kids.
It came to mind because I spent Tuesday this week at my cousin's house, tag team childcare, as she and I had various things we had to get done during that day and so we pooled our resources and I stayed at her place for the day (Thanks R!) At times, both of us were there - sharing looking after the kids and working on our computers. The kids always had one of us ready to pay attention to them, if not both of us. I really enjoyed the day - being able to chat occasionally and share the duties. It brought to mind other days where I have spent the day with other women and their children, and we have commented that the day seems easier and faster when you do it together. Now, it isn't always convenient or desirable to do this, but I think such a model reflects older cultural village style society, and I reckon this is how we are intended to do it. If only we didn't think that this means we are failing, and that going it alone is some kind of test of motherhood!
By the way if you were wondering why I haven't blogged for a while - it was my birthday a week ago, my husband's been away, and my mum is in hospital, among just some of the things going on.........
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Hope your mum's ok.
We had a speaker at our church last year who said that she knew of many mothers who were on antidepressants, and who struggled with parenting their children alone at home. She wondered if it had anything to do with the fact that so many women work now, including our mothers, who traditionally young mothers could have turned to for practical help. Certainly, for me to know my mother is on the end of the phone, whether she comes over to 'rescue me' on those awful days we all have or not, is a great comfort.
My old doctor (female) was a great fan of finding another young mother to share the childraising with - offloading kids for invaluable 'free' time for one mum, or just sharing the day together.
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